


Behind the mask

by VenlaMatleena



Category: Pushing Daisies
Genre: Depression, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Healing, Hopeful Ending, Suicidal Thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-22
Updated: 2016-04-22
Packaged: 2018-06-03 19:19:01
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,847
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6623032
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VenlaMatleena/pseuds/VenlaMatleena
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You (reader) move to a same building where Ned lives. </p><p>However you have some personal package that is shadowing your mind. Will you let Ned comfort you or will you push him away?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The strong and independent

**Author's Note:**

> I was going to publish this as one shot but I think it is slightly too long to be one, so... Here it is.

\- Who is that? Ned said one morning and ran to the window of his bakery/restaurant "Pie Hole". He had never seen you before. It meant that you must have been new in his neighborhood and now you were running to the bus stop in the rain. You were wearing red headphones, a denim miniskirt, black leggings, black faux-leather jacket and deep red lipstick. You were also wearing black eye makeup.   
In the evening Ned saw you again, returning from the bus stop. He noticed that you went into the same building where he lived, so there was a good chance that you were his neighbor. The following a couple of weeks Ned just followed you, passing daily by his bakery, never coming in for a slice of pie. Once he even went outside to "adjust the sign" and said "hello" but you did not hear him because of the headphones.

Ned was getting frustrated.

You had moved there from another city (and country). You were (your age)-year-old customer service person in a call center and you had noticed Ned, a tall, cute guy who conveniently seemed to be around always when you were passing the bakery. However you had never thought more about, surely a handsome guy such as him was married or dating at least. Your assumption was incorrect.  
One day when you were waiting for the bus with your headphones on, as usual, Ned decided to go and talk to you. You always took the same bus, but this time you had missed it, so there were about ten minutes before the next one came.

He did not put on his coat, but just walked to the stop and stood next to you. You were wearing a strong makeup again and looked very intimidating. Ned spoke to himself, trying to find the right words and catchy tone so he was basically repeating "hello, how are you? Yo whats up? Hi, 'sup?" to himself.  
\- Hi, I'm well. And you? you said.  
\- What? You heard me talking? I thought you were listening to music.  
\- I was but then I heard you talking and I thought you were talking to me... but you were just repeating "how are you"... so... I thought I would answer. So I'm well, how are you?  
\- I'm Ned.  
\- O-kay. Hi... Ned. I am (Y/N).  
\- I've seen you around...  
\- I live in that building. you said and pointed at the bakery.  
\- I own that bakery.  
\- Oh... well that's why I've seen you in the window and at the door. I once almost ran into you. you said and chuckled.  
\- We make pies, very good pies. You should definitely come and try them. I bake them myself from start to finish. We are open anytime you’re… around.  
\- Thanks for the invitation. So... are you on your way to a date?  
\- Why?  
\- You seem a little nervous, if you don’t mind me saying. And now that I think about it, you were practicing...  
\- I was not...   
\- Come on, let's hear it.  
\- Hear what?  
\- The thing... the... “sales pitch”. you said and air-quoted the last two words.  
\- Ok... Hi, I'm Ned, I believe we are neighbors and I wanted to ask you out.  
\- So... there's a girl, living in the same building with you and you want to ask her out... that's so sweet. Where do you live?  
\- Above my bakery.  
\- In the same building as me! you said and smiled.  
\- Yeah... he said and looked at the bus which was approaching. It was a minute too early.  
\- Where are you going... I mean, you're wearing only a... t-shirt...  
\- Nowhere...  
\- So why are you at the stop?  
\- Well... you...  
\- You came to talk to me? you asked and your smile changed into surprised –expression, almost like you would not be able to believe that he, the cutest guy in the neighborhood, came to talk… to you.  
\- Yes...  
The bus stopped. You smiled and walked to the bus door. You got in and waved at Ned when the bus drove away.

Ned walked back in. It was a spring but still a bit chilly.  
\- How did it go? his friend Chuck asked.  
\- Not too well. Ned answered and leaned to the sales counter. He looked disappointed, bothered and pursed his lips slightly. Then he groaned and buried his face into his hands.  
\- What happened?  
\- Nothing...  
\- Well... she will most likely pass by the Pie Hole in the evening. Maybe this time she will come and say "hi".  
The evening came and so you returned by bus back home from work. Ned did not know whether it would be smart to go and bother you again or... Maybe it was smarter to wait for your move. The bus arrived, the usual time. You got out from the bus. It had been a long day and you had been dealing with too many reclamations, the weight of the world was really pushing you down as it hung from your shoulders. 

Ned was closing the bakery, earlier than usual. He waved at you through the window and you stopped, put your worries aside and faked a smile. Ned came out.  
\- Hi! Ned said and smiled in the most adorable way possible.  
\- Hi Ned, closing? you asked and smiled back. The fake smile changed into genuine one.  
\- Yeah… I thought I might have a date tonight.  
\- Really?  
\- I met a gorgeous lady this morning at the bus stop and I was wondering if she was hungry after a long day of work.  
\- Well… if she is a normal person or at least not completely insane… she is hungry. you answered.  
\- Good. Shall we? he said and opened the door. You nodded and went in, Ned followed you. The bakery smelled of dinner. Ned helped the coat off your shoulders.  
\- So, what’cha cooking?  
\- It’s a surprise, but it’s not a pie.  
\- Not a pie? Are you suggesting that you can actually cook something else as well?   
\- Maybe…  
\- It’s good to be versatile.   
\- Yeah, I guess. When did you move here?  
\- Some weeks ago.  
\- Where did you move from? You have an accent that I cannot quite recognize.  
\- (your city/country).  
\- You’re quite far away from home!  
\- Yeah, I wanted to get as far as possible. you mumbled to yourself.  
Ned smiled and looked at you, for a moment he thought that he sensed that you were running away from something. He seemed a little nervous. He set the table and served the food.  
\- Is everything alright? you asked.  
\- Yes, do I not seem alright?  
\- You’re alright, but maybe a little nervous. Why is that?  
\- It’s very rare for me to have such lovely company…  
\- Oh come on…  
\- I mean it!  
\- So, neighbor, you live alone?  
\- No…   
\- Oh?  
\- I have a dog, Digby.   
\- Girlfriend? Wife?  
\- No, just me and my dog. And you?  
\- No wife and no girlfriend, not even a dog. Just me.  
Ned looked relieved. You ate and chatted for couple of hours and then you helped him to clean up. After that he walked you home. You said goodnights and agreed to go out again. You spent some time together, almost every evening during the following three and half weeks. Then suddenly you stopped staying in touch. When you got home from work, you actually took another route just to avoid bumping into Ned.


	2. The sad and hopeless

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Like most of the masks, even the one you have been wearing, will crack and the damage might be too much for you to bear alone.
> 
> Luckily... you're not alone.

Ned was worried, he had loved the time he had spent with you. You were funny and smart and he thought that you were the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. He knew that it was probably too early to assume anything or make any demands whatsoever but he knew he had to. 

It was a Friday evening and it was raining heavily. You had decided to take the bus all the way to the nearest stop possible because you were carrying a heavy shopping bag. Ned saw you and ran outside.  
\- Let me take that! he said and took the bag from your hand. You were surprised and clearly found the situation awkward. Ned did not ask anything, he followed you up to your floor. You were standing at your door and you tried to fit the keys in the lock. You were nervous which cause your hands to shake. You managed to open the door eventually.  
\- Thanks for the help, I can take the bag now.  
\- No, no… let me. Ned said and walked in. He saw all the moving boxes still unopened and the furniture in one corner. He heard you mumbling “shit”.

\- You have not unpacked yet?   
You were silent, clearly embarrassed for the notion. Ned turned facing you, you looked sad and tired, almost hopeless; like a person who was about to drown and had realized that there was nothing to do but to accept the pending death and try to find some kind of peace before completely letting go.  
\- Why haven’t you unpacked yet?  
\- I… haven’t really decided whether I’m staying or not. you answered, but it sounded more like a riddle to Ned than an answer. You hoped that he would not ask any further questions because to be honest, you were too tired and sad to give an explanation for anything; for the unpacked boxes, for the sudden loss of keeping in touch, for any of your actions or your current state of depression. Days like these life really made no sense and you just wanted to isolate yourself somewhere… maybe fall asleep and never wake up again. Yeah, that would be good.  
\- But this is a lovely apartment and if I may point out that you have a nice neighbor… Ned said and tried to make you smile. He was now more worried than he had been during past few weeks and he did not know what to say or do. His genuine desire was to be there for you, but you were shutting him out and pushing him away.

\- Can you go? you asked.  
\- No.   
\- Please…  
\- I’ve been worried about you. I thought we shared something. I really like you…  
\- I’m just so tired, I’m not really in the mood for this serious talk about my life, not right now.  
\- Don’t you… like me anymore?  
\- It’s not about that.  
\- What is it then about?  
\- I’m just so tired…  
\- Of what? Me?  
\- No! Life… in general. I moved to get away from my troubles, but the troubles followed and I’m just not strong enough to cope.  
\- But you’re always so… confident and… strong.  
\- It’s just a mask.  
\- A lie?  
\- No… it’s a dream-version of myself which I currently am not but… I keep faking happy until I cannot do it anymore.  
\- Weren’t you happy when we were spending time together? Were you faking?  
\- No! No, gosh, no! Please don’t think that. I… I am faulty, I don’t fit in. you said and started to cry. You had been crying yourself to sleep almost every night during a couple of weeks, but the tears had not helped. They just burned your eyes and skin as they poured from your eyes.

Ned had never even hugged you but now he felt that he needed to do so. He walked to you and wrapped his arms around you. He listened to your helpless sobbing silently until he noticed that you calmed down.  
\- Why didn’t you say anything? he asked and ran his fingers through your hair.  
\- Like what?  
\- I don’t know… Anything. I could had listened, offer my shoulder.  
\- I’m a mess…  
\- I adore you. he whispered and hugged you tighter. He ran his fingers up and down on your back and breathed in the scent of your hair.  
\- Let’s unpack. he whispered and kissed your forehead. He reluctantly let you go and started to open some boxes. He asked where everything belonged and tried to casually ask you question about your life and why you were so sad. Your answers were short at first but then you started to open up and tell things even by yourself so Ned didn’t even have to ask the questions.  
\- How have you pictured the layout of the apartment? Ned asked when you had put together all your clothes and dishes on their places.  
\- I haven’t…  
\- Why? he asked. A long silence followed. You did not know whether you dared to answer honestly of not. You decided to give him a straight answer with no sugar-coating or cherries on the top.  
\- I was going to sell everything, use the money on a cruise ticket and jump off the boat. Or I don’t know, some part of me wants to keep on going and a part of me wants just to… give up.  
With that being said Ned hugged you again, but this time from behind. He buried his face into your hair and pulled you into his arms where there was safe and warm.  
\- Start picturing, because you’re not going anywhere. he said and put his hand on your cheek and rubbed it with his thumb slowly. His other fingers traced your jaw and occasionally caressed your neck and earlobe gently. You felt strangely comfortable being close to him. Ned seemed a genuinely good guy who would never hurt anyone. You placed your hand over his and held it. After pressing a soft kiss on his knuckles you said  
\- Yeah… it looks like that.

You arranged the furniture with Neds help and plugged in the tv, computer and other devices. You did not have too much stuff so everything was done in few hours, well, most of it anyway.  
\- Wow, you have a good taste! Very cool! Ned said.  
\- Thanks. It’s mostly Ikea…   
\- No… it’s you. Tomorrow we shall put the stuff on the walls and do the finishing touches. Then…  
\- Then?  
\- Then you’ll invite me over and we’ll start again; no masks, no faking. Ok?  
\- Ok. But please, stay tonight. I really don’t want to be alone.  
\- Good. I’ll take you to bed now, it’s getting late. he said and took your hand. He led you to the bedroom and lay you down. He lay next to you and wrapped his arm around you. You fell asleep quickly, so did he. In the morning you got off the bed before Ned even woke up. You went to the bathroom, put the water on, stepped under the warm water and cried some more. This time you felt like the weight was melting away and the warm water was washing your heart clean from the heartaches and disappointments. You got out, got dressed and started to organize stuff again. 

Soon Ned woke up and got off the bed. He found you putting your movies into the bookshelf.   
\- Morning. you said and smiled.  
\- Hi. Ned answered and smiled as well.  
\- You look different. he continued.  
\- I took a shower and washed away all the makeup.  
\- You look beautiful. he said but he noticed that it was something else as well than just the lack of makeup that made you look different; your eyes seemed to look at the world with a new way, there was hope. You had started to heal.  
\- Oh come on! you chuckled. You rarely let anyone see you without makeup because it felt like when you did, it was easier to see behind the mask, the role of a strong individual that you tried to perform, and when someone saw behind it, it was almost like you had given the person a loaded AK-47 and a permission to fire at will.  
\- You do. I adore you. he said and started to organize your movie collection with you. You chuckled silently as you adored back him secretly when he read the back covers of your movies. He tilted his head and muttered half aloud “this one I want to see… and this one… and this”.  
\- Still? you asked casually. He did not raise his eyes from the cover and answered just as casually  
\- Of course.  
\- …and now we’ll order some pie. Ned said with a smile on his face, put the movies to the shelf and called his friend Chuck who quickly brought him a freshly baked pie.

After eating and finishing everything it was time for Ned to go home and visit the Pie Hole as well. He went there to let Chuck home early. It was not a busy night. He was reading magazines at the sales counter when the door opened. He lifted his gaze from the page and saw you walking towards him. He smiled. You offered your hand for a handshake.  
\- Hi… I’m (Y/N), an emotional fuck-up. Nice to meet you.  
Ned shook your hand and smiled.  
\- Hi (Y/N). I’m Ned, the owner of this place.  
\- It’s a nice place. So Ned, do you serve food at this hour or is the kitchen closed?  
Ned walked on to you, put his hands on your cheeks and kissed you softly on your lips.  
\- What was the question? I’ve lost my train of thought… he said when he parted his lips from yours.  
\- What question? you mumbled and pulled him closer into tight embrace.


End file.
